To Resolve Or Not To Resolve

After weeks of holiday celebrations, beginning with Halloween and running right through Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas and Kwanza, the celebration of New Year's Eve almost seems an afterthought.  In fact, it is the last hurrah of the Old Year, the culminating breath, that final sigh of relief, It's over at last, let's move on to something new.

It's the something new that always grabs my attention.  At some point in November, I find myself gravitating toward the aisles of calendars and day-planners that begin showing up in all the stores.  (Actually, you can find them in many stores in August but I refuse to give up on the present that early.)  By the time January 1st rolls around, however, I'm ready with new calendars on the walls, a large planner on my desk and, of course, fully synchronized calendars on my computer, cell phone and iPad.  And then comes the big question, to make New Year's Resolutions this new year or not.

New Year's Resolutions have come into disfavor in recent years, probably because too many of us are quick to rattle them off our tongues without really thinking them through and, more importantly, without incorporating the required commitment into our hearts.  And commitment it is, since most resolutions involve the changing or eliminating of habits that are considered bad or undesirable. Unfortunately, habits are usually the result of years of repeatedly choosing paths of least resistance and it is never easy to suddenly change course and head upstream against the strong moving current of past responses.

I don't think, however, that just because we've broken our resolutions in the past that we should give up on the practice all together.  After all, it is a very old one dating back to pre-Christian times, and usually customs that have survived that long have done so for a reason.  Like natural selection helping us sort out the genes that don't work, customs that stand the test of time usually (though certainly not always) help us get in touch with our inner better selves.

Like Janus, the Roman god of doors and beginnings who had two faces, one looking forward and one looking back, our month of January, named for that very god, is a good time for us to look back and learn from our past even as we look forward to the New Year.

But looking backwards and deciding to change or eliminate certain behaviors can be extremely difficult if we don't have something to fill the void.  Giving up smoking, for instance,is hard enough on the physical body without the emotional void it leaves.  What do you do with hands while you're talking on the phone or having a drink with friends?  Just knowing that it's the best thing for your health very often isn't enough to keep you from lighting up one more time.  And knowing that you should exercise 4-5 times a weeks probably isn't enough motivation to keep that New Year's Resolution when the weather's cold and rainy in February.

But I'm going to try not to get discouraged.  I've been through a lot of changes this past year, some of them quite scary for me, and this New Year promises even more of them.  I have to resolve to not let these fears get the better of me but to push forward with confidence, even if it means taking just baby steps each day.  To this end, I have a feeling I'll be putting my calendars and planners to really good use this year.  Moving forward each day, some days just baby steps, some days leaps (I hope).  Whatever it takes, keeping my goals constantly in my sights.  I hope you will do the same, too.